Lately I’ve been seriously considering moving to France. For many, many reasons. First and foremost, I have this weird desire to go there and BE. Like, I’m supposed to be there already, but I’m freaking late. LATE. I’m not late for anything.

Wade has his porn on the computer, and by porn, I mean not naked women. Although that is looked at also. I mean our individual eye candy. He likes to peruse bobber motorcycles on ebay and other such sites while I listen to new music, check out vegan blogs, and read about moving to France. And I look at gites. With gorgeous gardens and rooms that make me want to be there last week. Where is my vespa? Where are my eggless baguettes (is there such thing) and beautiful, seductive French men?

Sidenote: There is a man I work with who for some reason is SO INCREDIBLY sexy right now. I was so horny yesterday that I thought if I walked too much I might rub one out by myself, and when he found this out he tormented by coming up behind me and standing really close. Breathing on my neck and rubbing his facial hair on me, hugging me for longer than necessary and just touching me on the arms and slipping his fingers over my ass and then later he ALMOST ALMOST made me cheat on my SOULMATE by asking for a kiss in Spanish in a very, very entreating, pleading way. “Un beso, por favor”.

I need to tell you that at that point I put my head in my hands, and I had to take deep, slow breaths, and remind myself of a commitment to someone else. I shouldn’t need a reminder, but my vagina was freaking aching. God, I should have turned around and smacked one on him, and then tore off our clothes and done it against the counter……sigh. This is the effect that horniness has. Its ridiculous. I understand how people cheat–they’re weak. When faced with that, I mean, GOD. But I’m not that weak. Spicy Chilean men seem to be my weakness this week. And I need to say out loud in webspace that if I did not have Wade in my life I would have slept with this man SO many times. He has this uncanny ability to be inches away from me and make my body feel like its on fire. And that is so Nora Roberts of me to say, but she must have had a spicy Chilean like mine.

Back to the Freedom country….I’ve checked out books on France and took some language lessons online, and read about the economy, culture, food, etc. I’m still going strong. If anyone has anything to tell me about France, feel free. I do make it idealistic in my head by imagining picnicking with Wade in the French countryside, and then returning to Paris so we can kiss each other on the terraces which are everywhere! SO romantic.

Now I’m so horny from writing about that I think I need to take a cold shower, jump my boyfriend when he gets home….would that be bad? Yikes.