Dear Jen,

I’m writing this letter to you because I know you need to read it when you’re feeling like you want one. One would be a cigarette. I know, letter addressed to self might explode the cheesometer, but I feel like it will work. When I’m not smoking and I don’t want one sometimes the cool benefits of not smoking anymore go through my head, and they make me feel great. But when I get that craving I never remember them. Having them written down will help, I think.

  • Your apartment doesn’t smell like smoke anymore
  • Theres no plague-like ash all over the tables and the rest of your belongings. Your apartment stays cleaner longer, and its beautiful. Its not all over the desk anymore.
  • Wade’s nose and sinuses don’t bother him anymore. He’s sniffle free.
  • You’re saving 130 dollars a month.
  • You’re saving your lungs in the long run.
  • Your kids won’t smoke, probably, if you don’t. You did because your parents do, and thats why Kyle and Thomas both smoke. Ridiculous.
  • People won’t smell it on you at work when you’re at tables.
  • There’s not cigarette pack litter all over your car.
  • Theres not a nasty smell in your nice NEW car.
  • Theres not ash all over the interior.
  • Ivy is probably better for it.
  • You just got over the DEPRESSION it caused. If you start smoking again, and then you quit again, you’ll have to go through that ALL OVER AGAIN. And I don’t think you can.
  • You just lost 7 of the ten pounds you gained because of it.
  • Your skin and hair are prettier and smell better….mmm.
  • It’s not good for the environment, you little hippie.
  • It supports a ridiculously bad industry. Like, the classic capitalist evil one.
  • Less chance of there being a housefire or other such happenings.
  • No more burns on the furniture, like the one on the kitchen table that you love so much.

Hopefully I can add to this later.

Love,

Me